Don't let others kill your mental game
A letter to first time competitors...
Dear Beautiful Badass,
"Didn't you already go to the gym today?"
"God, go eat a pizza or something."
"Wait, so all you win is a plastic trophy?"
Are you cringing yet? Can you add about a hundred other jerk comments to that list that you've heard? If you can't, you unfortunately will probably get your fair share by the end of prep.
Choosing to take on a fitness competition is not a choice to be taken lightly. It requires a lifestyle that is not "normal."
When I went through my first prep, I got a little obsessed. I wanted all the cute clothes the "instagram famous" girls were wearing. I wanted to drink out of a gallon jug (back when that was cool.) I wanted to always eat out of trendy tupperware and post about it on social media. I wanted to be one of those "fitness girls." Well, in actuality I'm an electrical engineer who works in corporate america... I have a great fashion sense on Pinterest, but fail on the execution... and have a cupboard filled with mismatch containers that are stained and all f*cked up from the microwave. In essence, I'm no Paige Hathaway. BUT, that didn't stop those around me from noticing changes that were going on...
I came in to work early because I was lifting at 4:00am to avoid the crowds.
I was ditching group lunches to eat my prepared meals at my desk.
I was eating ALL THE TIME.
I was losing weight.
I was telling my family that yes, I know avocados are "healthy" but I won't be eating them on my salad because I already have things measured out.
I was popping a lot of horse pills. (Why are vitamins so damn huge?!)
I was doing things that other people in my office, my family, and my life weren't doing. Well beautiful, the sucky truth is that there are a lot of lame people in the world that immediately become haters on things they don't understand. Like when the mildly obese person looks at you like you're insane while you're eating chicken and rice out of a tupperware and says "You're getting too skinny. Go eat a cheeseburger." WTF?! Now, what I wanted to say was "And You're getting too fat, go eat a salad. With no ranch" but of course that's completely socially unacceptable. That particular comment actually happened to me. And let me tell you, I was PISSED. I was hurt. I was questioning my decision to take on prep.
You can't control others reactions to what you're doing, but you CAN control your inner talk.
It's taken me a long time to truly learn that statement, and more importantly, put it into practice. People questioning your decisions is hard. But at the end of the day, you've chosen to take on the preparation for a fitness competition. It was YOUR choice, and gorgeous, you don't owe ANYONE an explanation.
By the time I finished prep... that cheeseburger biatch had come to me for "diet and workout tips." Along with a slew of other people who were turned off by my efforts at first, and then realized that A) what I was doing, I was doing in a healthy way... and B) it f*cking worked.
So know this... prep will not be all rainbows and selfies. (And if it is, seriously, I applaud you for surrounding yourself with such amazing people!) Just remember that at first they'll question why, and then they'll ask you how. You CAN do this. YOU are BEAUTIFUL. YOU are BADASS.
Prep is just as much mental as it is physical. I didn't realize that in the beginning, but I get it now. That's why I have this very conversation with SO many of my clients... as they're sitting in my office, or on the other end of the phone, almost in tears because their boyfriend is pissed they won't go drinking... or their mom made some rude comment. My best advice is to stay positive, remind them that this is your choice and your life, and again, do not feel the need to over explain. If they don't get it, or react poorly, that's on them.
A great resource on this topic is a podcast episode from the show "The Joy Junkie" that just aired. I love this podcast because there's no BS, they cuss (sorry, I got it from my momma), and it really helps bring you back to some deep issues without feeling like you're needing to see a shrink. Anyways, if you're looking for help with dealing with the feeling of needing to EXPLAIN YO'SELF (aka. defend your choiced) to those around you, take some time and LISTEN HERE.
Also, feel free to reach out to me. We're a community here at AmandaLouise and want to see you SHINE.